The comfort of big pots bubbling.

I was on my way home from a half-day (too sick to make it through a full one) when I realized what I really needed was a bit pot of homemade soup. I stopped for a few essentials and spent the next couple of hours making cornbread (with the fresh white corn sprinkled throughout the batter) and mushroom beef barley, with a slew of creminis sauteed with a little onion in savory butter. I threw in a little sage while the beef was browning and it turned out perfectly. I look forward to feasting on it all week.

It's 4:22 and I'm snuggled under the covers with my arm-warmers on because it's just so cold in my bedroom. This is the way I like it, but the contrast between this room and the rest of the house makes me shiver.

You know, I really love my engagement ring. It's SO me, and I knew it right away. I just can't believe our luck in finding it! Then the luck that it fits so well...it feels like it's part of me. Normally I can't wait to take off my jewelry as soon as I walk in the door, but I never take this off and sometimes I feel for it to make sure it's on because it just feels like ME.

I'm also feeling a little bit of guilt over not having a maid or matron of honor and any bridesmaids, but Attila has no one in this country and no one can come over, so no one will be there for him. I want it to be the 2 of us with friends surrounding us, but I don't want to do anything that emphasizes his solitude. I just want us to be surrounded by love and friendship, undifferentiating, because we are one. I am not lost in this relationship, I am more myself than ever...my complete self, happy.

♥e